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Thread: Thoughts going out to past members...

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    Thoughts going out to past members...

    Hi all,
    Some of our friends have signed off and wanted to extend an olive branch to those that left the forum. I know some here have thought about these old friends and I do think some were on the fence about leaving. Perceived hurts by other members caused a chain reaction. Sooz and Calz come to mind but also Eelco and others, and just wanted to open the door and let them know they are still in our thoughts.

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    maybe invite them back in a email that the one truth will always be here if you need it ( whenever you have a wish for it to be there in your life )

    if something's needs doing do it well

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    I agree with you jonsnow and thank you Mojo many of us miss our friends, you can feel the silence, they are truly missed they brought so much to tot, I am really happy we have many new people here on tot but most of them wont feel the atmosphere that used to be here and that is very sad at least to me, and so for what it's worth I am asking with a true heart that they will consider returning to tot. Sincerely gardener

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    I wonder why they all left?

    Who's really to "blame" ? If anybody is at all...

    Merciless thread moderation means many more members might move on. People act like kids, whether it's mod's/admin leaving the forum for months just because one member "picks on" you while noone is around late at night or whether being banned from a thread causes you to unsubscribe altogether we are all children here lol.

    I shall hold a candle for the family I grew to love, may they return when forum moderation objectivity returns.
    Last edited by monk, 12th May 2015 at 09:44.

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    Quote Originally posted by monk View Post
    Merciless thread moderation means many more members might move on.
    There is no "merciless thread moderation". There is however moderation, and if all members were to behave themselves and act like grownups, then we wouldn't need to be doing so much moderating in the first place.

    Quote Originally posted by monk View Post
    People act like kids
    Yes, they do, and that's the problem, right there.

    Quote Originally posted by monk View Post
    I shall hold a candle for the family I grew to love, may they return when forum moderation objectivity returns.
    People in glass houses shouldn't be throwing stones around. Try walking in our shoes for a while. Then you will actually have something to complain about.

    = DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR =

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    But I have so many stones!? Lol

    Ok well I guess all those former members were victims of a collectively shared delusion.

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    Quote Originally posted by monk View Post
    But I have so many stones!? Lol

    Ok well I guess all those former members were victims of a collectively shared delusion.
    Lol, I'm falling in love with you Monk.

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    Hi Aragorn ( and others in the game here ) ,

    a minor observation for some of you here - and there - mods or not . An observation, certainly not a complain, I have zero reason to complain about anything here since I don't post often , and avoiding people - even if they're few here who already have some sort of body-tailored opinion - avoiding hurts , simple as that .
    I won't go deeper to this statement for reasons rather complicated .

    But I've learned something here , about the 'world of warcraft' on March 20th this year that costed the rest of mums life and some nerves to me ..and nah, of course , it was all my fault . Just for taking part . I should not have done it .

    It's been madness around here since few months ago , with old peace and friendships disrupted , people and posts censored , yes we're all learning something . Fairly decent and thoughtful people were taken aback by company of others - gamers whose 'job' is more like enjoying the game and taking over the collective rules .
    It's all about rules since last few months, isn't it so . The problem is that you 've inevitably built what you yourself hated elsewhere , thin glass wall between 'you' and 'them' , the 'mods team ' ( and affiliated members ), whoever is in ... and 'ordinary membership' .

    It simply goes that far that you ( not saying you personally ) don't see /feel peoples point of view really well . Behind the glass wall you continue singing kumbhaya , 'we are good, we are honest, we are trying our best ' .

    I believe you . Reminds me of mum and 'being the best mum' . It can make everyone around feel like ... *** but the parent or other authority will never notice because when people feel like ..*** .. they just walk away and keep dumb till they can talk to someone really honest who does not make them feel that way .

    I'm not questioning designers of this 'forum software' or people who wrote the basic set of rules for all such forums so that you have something to hold to and how to run society . We all know the rules are flexible .

    Though , what people make of themselves on some of these boards can be close to some sort of Orwellian dystopia . I think , perhaps , they want to know the feeling

    And yes BB is always innocent , that's the principle of the game just in case someone has missed it. To be 'goodies' you need to have 'baddies' .



    Oh uh ah

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    Quote Originally posted by monk View Post
    But I have so many stones!? Lol
    So I've noticed. And apparently also an incontrollable urge to cast them, regardless of whether doing so would be justified or not.

    Quote Originally posted by monk View Post
    Ok well I guess all those former members were victims of a collectively shared delusion.
    That is one way of describing it, yes. Another description -- and perhaps a more correct one -- would be to say that they were the victims of an insidious and carefully carried out PsyOp, perpetrated by a handful of very determined troublemakers, and exacerbated by people who didn't necessarily mean bad, but who were unable to see past their own egos -- people who talk the talk but don't walk the walk. For that matter, I would also like to point out that your very own cynical innuendos haven't exactly been helpful in that regard. People don't seem to realize that every single action they undertake, every single word they utter, can have very far-reaching and (often but not always) unintended consequences.

    Also, in addition to the above, I would like to add -- just as an FYI -- that we knew that a PsyOp was going to take place here at The One Truth because we had been receiving heads-up warnings about that from two very distinct and unrelated sources. Unfortunately, with only a small staff, things did get out of hand quite quickly, and so we were also forced to intervene just as quickly -- and at times even abruptly -- in order to contain the damage.

    People never gave us the benefit of the doubt. And that's extremely unfair, because that's a courtesy that we ourselves do extend to our members.

    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    Lol, I'm falling in love with you Monk.
    Actually, Ria, that one sentence here-above says a lot more about you than you realize.
    = DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR =

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    Monk
    Ok well I guess all those former members were victims of a collectively shared delusion.
    Quote Originally posted by Aragorn View Post
    -- that is one way of describing it, yes. Another description -- and perhaps a more correct one -- would be to say that they were the victims of an insidious and carefully carried out PsyOp,

    perpetrated by a handful of very determined troublemakers, and exacerbated by people who didn't necessarily mean bad, but who were unable to see past their own egos -- people who talk the talk but don't walk the walk. For that matter, I would also like to point out that your very own cynical innuendos haven't exactly been helpful in that regard. People don't seem to realize that every single action they undertake, every single word they utter, can have very far-reaching and (often but not always) unintended consequences.

    Also, in addition to the above, I would like to add -- just as an FYI -- that we knew that a PsyOp was going to take place here at The One Truth because we had been receiving heads-up warnings about that from two very distinct and unrelated sources.
    Don't you think you are being a tad over dramatic.

    These people you refer to, I have known for some time your perception are way off and quite rude, they are not all fools and are quite capable of seeing beyond there egos.
    And how do you know what their talk and walk is with in there own lives, again you have been rude.

    Where are you getting your information from the PsyOp them selfs.

    "Actually, Ria, that one sentence here-above says a lot more about you than you realize"

    Yet another attempt at being rude
    Fortunately some people have a sense of humour.

    Now I waiting on your response, because your ego won't be able to help its self.
    Last edited by Ria, 12th May 2015 at 12:02.

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    The way I see it this forum serves a purpose for those of us who are here. For those who left, it had served its purpose and there was nothing further to be gained either for the forum or the members who left. Perhaps some of them will return when they have something to share, or a need that can only be met here. Not really a cause for concern IMO.

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    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    [...]It's been madness around here since few months ago , with old peace and friendships disrupted , people and posts censored , yes we're all learning something . Fairly decent and thoughtful people were taken aback by company of others - gamers whose 'job' is more like enjoying the game and taking over the collective rules .
    It's all about rules since last few months, isn't it so . The problem is that you 've inevitably built what you yourself hated elsewhere , thin glass wall between 'you' and 'them' , the 'mods team ' ( and affiliated members ), whoever is in ... and 'ordinary membership' .
    I'm not so sure that the moderator team would have been responsible for that, Agape. But you do bring up an interesting point farther down in your post.

    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    It simply goes that far that you ( not saying you personally ) don't see /feel peoples point of view really well . Behind the glass wall you continue singing kumbhaya , 'we are good, we are honest, we are trying our best ' .

    I believe you . Reminds me of mum and 'being the best mum' . It can make everyone around feel like ... *** but the parent or other authority will never notice because when people feel like ..*** .. they just walk away and keep dumb till they can talk to someone really honest who does not make them feel that way .
    Well, if you were to look behind the scenes of the mod room, then you would see that we are actually very concerned with how our members feel, and what the truth is behind any situation, or behind any conflict. But as moderators, we have to be neutral, and so whatever decision we make, somebody somewhere is always going to feel wronged, and if we're unlucky, then both parties in the conflict will be feeling wronged by us. So we're always going to end up being painted as the bad guys. In other words, it's a no-win situation.

    And yet, we are doing what we do because we believe that we're doing the best we can -- for everyone, and for the long term. Of course, we are not perfect, and sometimes a decision is made too hastily. That happens; nobody is infallible. But such mistakes are more likely to occur in stressful situations where we have to react fast -- even before we know all the facts -- in order to be able to contain the situation.

    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    I'm not questioning designers of this 'forum software' or people who wrote the basic set of rules for all such forums so that you have something to hold to and how to run society . We all know the rules are flexible .
    The old rules that were in place here were almost entirely based upon those of another forum, but they were definitely outdated, and they were also being ignored by a certain group of members with -- shall we politely say -- antagonistic personalities. So we have revised those rules now, and we have simplified them. And yes, some of those rules are flexible, and we ourselves as moderators are also flexible towards the members of this community. But at some point, a line has to be drawn somewhere, and when members cross that line, then we do have to step in.

    I think you will find that the most abrupt-seeming moderator interventions usually occur when there is a great deal of stress being placed on the moderator team. We are only a small team, and not all of us are always available. And it's usually when only one moderator is on duty, or when all of the moderators are off-line, that such stress-inducing situations appear to break out, as if whoever is planning to stir up trouble is actually waiting until none of the moderators are on-line.

    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    Though , what people make of themselves on some of these boards can be close to some sort of Orwellian dystopia . I think , perhaps , they want to know the feeling
    This is the interesting point you bring up, as I mentioned higher up already. So what you are saying is that people actually provoke us into a reaction because they are longing for antagonism and polarity, rather than unity. Well, based upon what I've seen here at The One Truth in the past couple of weeks, I am actually inclined to agree with you on that.

    There appear to be certain people here who are addicted to drama and who really love all these little skirmishes. They are the people who talk the talk, but who do not walk the walk. But what they don't seem to realize -- or perhaps they simply don't care -- is what consequences this little indulgence of theirs has for the rest of the community.

    So then again, it all boils down to the same thing: do we let these people get away with it and bring down the entire forum and its community in the process, or do we step in as moderators and then have the wrath of our members poured down all over us because we soft-delete or unapprove posts without being able to tell anyone why we do what we do? I think you know what the answer to that question is.

    We have to protect the forum and the community, because if we don't and we let these antagonistic members run the show, then there would soon not be any community left anymore to protect.

    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    And yes BB is always innocent , that's the principle of the game just in case someone has missed it. To be 'goodies' you need to have 'baddies' .
    And yet, it could all be so much easier for everyone, if only people were willing to respect one another -- and that includes us as moderators -- instead of constantly casting stones at each other and looking for an enemy where there is none. How can humanity ever outgrow the difficulties of our existence in this exploitative society model we have here on Planet Earth if we keep on being antagonistic, rather than being cooperative and constructive?

    The future lies ahead. And it is ours for the taking, provided that we can prove ourselves worthy of it. It is time for everyone to assume their personal responsibility. And those who still haven't had enough of the drama should seek out other venues where they like that sort of thing. Many of them already have, actually, and we've now got several new and fine members signing up here -- people who are ready for that future, and who are willing to join us in creating it.
    = DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR =

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    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    Don't you think you are being a tad over dramatic.
    "Physician, heal thyself", Ria.

    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    These people you refer to, I have known for some time your perception are way off and quite rude, they are not all fools and are quite capable of seeing beyond there egos.
    And how do you know what their talk and walk is with in there own lives, again you have been rude.
    No, Ria, you are dead wrong, and once again, your comment here-above says more about you than you'd be willing to admit.

    For the record, the people whom I was talking about there are not the people you think I was talking about. In fact, I was talking about people whom you yourself have filed reports about to the moderator team.

    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    Where are you getting your information from the PsyOp them selfs.
    I said that there were two distinct and unrelated sources. I am under no obligation whatsoever to tell you who those sources were, Ria.

    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    "Actually, Ria, that one sentence here-above says a lot more about you than you realize"

    Yet another attempt at being rude
    Actually, no, it was a mere objective deduction. You always seem to align yourselves with those who behave antagonistically.

    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    Fortunately some people have a sensnce of humour.
    Oh, I could see the humor in that alright. But I could also see where that particular attempt at humor came from. You can't play with matches and not expect that there will be a fire, Ria.

    Quote Originally posted by Ria View Post
    Now I waiting on your response, because your ego won't be able to help its self.
    Unlike what you suspect, Ria -- but you are free to believe whatever you want, and nothing I or anyone else can say will change your mind anyway -- I am not responding from ego. I am responding from the most objective vantage I can assume, and that's a vantage in which there simply isn't any room for ego.

    Isn't it funny how the people who constantly complain about the restriction of their freedom are themselves always the ones who attempt to take others' freedom away in the first place?
    = DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR =

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    You see, lol, you couldn't stop your self.

    And there are all those assumption again....... Enjoy.

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    Here's one for ya

    This thread is called Thoughts going out to past members... but its the usual suspects that are off again dig here dig there

    I will point out that most of the members who left unsubscribed themselves to follow their buddies and they know exactly how to contact us should they realise that the grass is not always greener over on the other side.

    No disrespect but i will not be asking any of these members back and if they want to come back then i will be expecting an apology

    I thought this thread was a bad idea from the off but i thought the same members might have listened but it obvious its like talking to a wall

    Out of respect for the guests viewing this thread i will move it from public viewing if you continue.I will not let you make tot look like a laughing stock to our viewers that is guranteed

    My kids at nursery act more grown up
    No one person can ever change the truth, but the truth, once learned, can and will change the person

    You must be the change you wish to see in the world when you are through changing, you are through


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