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Thread: Thoughts going out to past members...

  1. #16
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    "An antagonist is a character, group of characters, institution, or concept that stands in or represents opposition against which the protagonist(s) must contend." - Depending on your SUBJECTIVE view I could be a terrorist or freedom fighter.

    I love you too Ria! :-) Though he is right don't encourage me lol.

    Y'know Viggo my friend if you would have been here in the before time, in the long long ago, you would have seen I was only "antagonistic" maybe 50-60 percent of the time, the other 40 I could be a real gent!

    Anyway, here's to past members and future alike, may the exploration and debate of our similarities and differences continue to relate to and evidence the level of our so called spiritual growth!

    Cheers!

  2. #17
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    Dear Malc and all moderators, I would like to thank all of you for the hard work you put in to tot I admit I have no clue what you guys have to put up with behind the scenes, I am always grateful to you for that, I am sorry if I have been a thorn, it is not my intension I have learned a lot from all of you and for that I am grateful. I am just very confused as to why you have to be so abrupt to people who truly support you I am just an ordinary person "seeking truth" as I believe all here are doing I am so sorry that you are feeling upset, I apologise if I have caused any of you to feel that way, and so I have to follow my inner self and above all my heart and regretfully unsubscribe wishing all of you the very best, and to say goodbye to the wonderful people I have found here.

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  4. #18
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    Gardener, you are one of the kindest members around here and you have nothing to worry about. I will be sad to see you go. There is a very, VERY tiny handful of members who cause problems around here, and any time new drama happens around here you can bet it was one (or more) of these members who initiated it or coerced unsuspecting members to contribute to it. I believe their end game is to make the good members feel uncomfortable around here so that they go. It's a form of sabotage in my opinion.

    We see what's going on, and we've been too nice, in hopes of not weirding out the rest of the 99.9% of members. But obviously that has backfired in our faces, so we can't do that either. That means we have to get tough on the troublemakers, that's all. I'm not proud to have to do it, but it's the only way to make this a comfortable place for the members who understand what TOT is all about.

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  6. #19
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    Like Sandy mentioned lessons for all... including me.. This thread itself was borderline between possibilities and raised issues which wasnt my intent which was supposed to be a thread for the folks that left to view and see and known they are in our thoughts and we are thinking about them. Gardener I agree with Church your very respectful to all and would be sad to see you go.
    Last edited by mojo, 12th May 2015 at 15:13.

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  8. #20
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    Well, Church and Mojo , now you have more people gone .. more thoughts to send out , no ?

    After all they're 'only people' , no rocket science . Ghosh .

    I'd recommend something like PhD in psychology if you want to administer or 'moderate' living people .

    Unless this is kids gaming forum. In that case , I'd suggest 2 degrees and what you call it - polygraph test - every week , for kids safety .


    Maybe if you can stop spending so much time on moderating , some of these nice people will come back ..


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  10. #21
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    Any nice people who left can come back anytime they want to. Not sure what point you are making, Agape?

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  12. #22
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    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    Well, Church and Mojo , now you have more people gone .. more thoughts to send out , no ?

    After all they're 'only people' , no rocket science . Ghosh .

    I'd recommend something like PhD in psychology if you want to administer or 'moderate' living people .

    Unless this is kids gaming forum. In that case , I'd suggest 2 degrees and what you call it - polygraph test - every week , for kids safety .


    Maybe if you can stop spending so much time on moderating , some of these nice people will come back ..

    Maybe if you stop spending so much time worrying about what we do around here then you will see we are doing the best thing for the forum

    Like we said they have gone on vacation and hopefully they will think of their actions whilst they are not here.Upon return if they wish to stay then they need to stop creating drama conflict

    I can guarantee whilst they are away there will be less drama which is a good thing dont you think agapae.I would just love to log in here one day at it be drama free
    No one person can ever change the truth, but the truth, once learned, can and will change the person

    You must be the change you wish to see in the world when you are through changing, you are through


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  14. #23
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    I don't know really Malc though I'd like to agree with you ... people could just relax , and come to see friends here without fear of being picked on , singled out as 'attention seekers' and known troublemakers' from the day one because you know,
    we all seem to have long life here and built associations and acquaintances , friends and enemies , most of whom we can't name or understand .

    It works elsewhere .. why not on the internet , no idea . If you invite 100 people to your garden , there may be 1 or 2 ''troublemakers'' the rest of people can usually enjoy themselves without police or moderation but we all know , things happen . Even in good families .

    I wish we all could surround you and your family with love ... and all those who need it ..

    Growing up

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    Just to be clear... no one is being singled out as a troublemaker. The argument can be made that certain people are singling themselves out as such, but we keep relentlessly doing everything in our power to keep any kind of singling out from appearing in public view.

    In keeping with your garden metaphor... what would you do if you had a hundred people in your garden, and there were 1 or 2 people who were proudly going around walking all over your tulips, digging up your roses, and spraying vinegar on your chrysanthemums? Especially after some of the 98 or 99 others were feeling uncomfortable because no one was stepping up and putting an end to it?

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  18. #25
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    ouch...but you know what thats ok, you should be able to say what you wish... Im willing to learn and I never said said I was perfect, if you feel Im not a doing good please say so, I wont take it personal. I was asked to mod and accepted it thinking I could be a benefit. Im willing to reflect on it now and how I can be better but just as easy I can be a regular member and take off the mod hat..no personal agendas here Agape

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  20. #26
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    There is a lot of stuff going on in the world right now, and new information and whistleblowers and this and that coming out all the time. Even if we aren't interested in current events, there are still lots of historical and scientific mysteries that we could talk about, or spiritual pursuits, different meditation techniques...

    My point is that if we take a step back and look at the things on TOT that seem to attract the most energy (and it doesn't seem to be positive energy), it's members making personal jabs at one another and endless complaints about how that is then handled, mostly by the same people who were engaging in making personal remarks towards each other in the first place.

    So if we take all of this in, and think about what we have been focused on lately, and then what we could be focusing on instead, you can begin to see the real problem here. Whether there was some intentional effort to sabotage the stability of this community or not, every person that has become sucked into it has a personal responsibility as to what they are personally contributing to the community and whether these are contributions that strengthen us, or tear us down.

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  22. #27
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    Quote Originally posted by Church View Post
    Just to be clear... no one is being singled out as a troublemaker. The argument can be made that certain people are singling themselves out as such, but we keep relentlessly doing everything in our power to keep any kind of singling out from appearing in public view.

    In keeping with your garden metaphor... what would you do if you had a hundred people in your garden, and there were 1 or 2 people who were proudly going around walking all over your tulips, digging up your roses, and spraying vinegar on your chrysanthemums? Especially after some of the 98 or 99 others were feeling uncomfortable because no one was stepping up and putting an end to it?
    I'd hire a Gardener

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  24. #28
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    Quote Originally posted by Church View Post
    Just to be clear... no one is being singled out as a troublemaker. The argument can be made that certain people are singling themselves out as such, but we keep relentlessly doing everything in our power to keep any kind of singling out from appearing in public view.

    In keeping with your garden metaphor... what would you do if you had a hundred people in your garden, and there were 1 or 2 people who were proudly going around walking all over your tulips, digging up your roses, and spraying vinegar on your chrysanthemums? Especially after some of the 98 or 99 others were feeling uncomfortable because no one was stepping up and putting an end to it?
    98 or 99 people putting up with one or two assholes is a sign of the dysfunction of the former. How do a few mods exceed the 'power' of a few to control? Because they do not own their own power. That said, it is obvious too many people are emotionally retarded and NEED to have moderators manage their affairs for them. However, the mods have ban and removal tools that the rest do not possess.

    All of this would cease if people practiced personal responsibility for their actions. Removal of trolls should not be an issue but, a fractured and dysfunctional community wavers and is uncertain of what they support and things fall into chaos.

    What is going on in this forum is a powerful learning experiment towards the self-governance many claim they want. The words are there but the actions and behaviors are not.

    Want self-governance? Then walk the talk.
    Last edited by modwiz, 12th May 2015 at 18:09.
    "To learn who rules over you simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize" -- Voltaire

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  26. #29
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    Quote Originally posted by mojo View Post
    ouch...but you know what thats ok, you should be able to say what you wish... Im willing to learn and I never said said I was perfect, if you feel Im not a doing good please say so, I wont take it personal. I was asked to mod and accepted it thinking I could be a benefit. Im willing to reflect on it now and how I can be better but just as easy I can be a regular member and take off the mod hat..no personal agendas here Agape
    Mojo, I will admit to not being sure about you as a mod. You have blossomed in this assignment. Job well done. Not looking for perfection, just a good heart and efforts. You have not disappointed.

    My focus on you does not exclude other mods but, you were an exception for me.
    "To learn who rules over you simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize" -- Voltaire

    "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."-- Eleanor Roosevelt

    "Misery loves company. Wisdom has to look for it." -- Anonymous

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  28. #30
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    Quote Originally posted by Agape View Post
    I'd hire a Gardener
    Isn't that what the moderators are, in this metaphor?

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