Rhosgobel Tent At TOT

[Spiral]

I am guessing this is all old news that has been dealt with. Parents forgiven or exiled, preferably forgiven, and we move on with our lives. Anything else is dysfunctional. Not to mention a giving away of one's power.

If I have guessed incorrectly, is is because the best outcome is desired for and I wished to project that.

Yes it is old news, they are forgiven because I understand the mechanism at play & don't see it as their fault either, and have them at a suitable distance of 1000+ miles for good measure

I love my parents so much, although growing up was . . . precarious. It's a VERY tough job being a parent and nobody gets it just right because everybody's so different and has different needs. I may not have made the same mistakes that my folks made but I probably ****ed my kids up just the same. Who among us had a perfect upbringing must be very lucky indeed. Just have to remember all that love, and let it flow, I guess

I don't see how any parent can be perfect (no one is), but as long as they do parent their children & love them they are doing both what they can & their duty, unfortunately narcissistic parents do neither, but demand that the child act as if they do in front of others, sometimes the child will delude themselves about the parent(s) in what is called a "fantasy bond" which often proves disastrous in later life, fortunately for me I was never under such an illusion, unlike my poor brothers who still don't get it.

Any way

[Sooz]

One thing I learnt from studying history at Uni, was the effect that wars had on the father, the man. Of course when they came home it affected their wife, and then a flow-on effect to the children in turn.

And that in turn flows down into a generational thing.

I can see that happened in my family. And it is no-one's fault, not the individual.

Easy to see with 20/20 hindsight. It doesn't correct the problems overnight though. But being aware of it is half the battle.

I have handwritten letters my Grandfather wrote to his Mother during the first world war. Very stoic, matter of fact, when stating the most inhumane of conditions.

One particular letter (probably when his psychic guard was down and very ill) spoke of seeing his best mate's brains blown out, right next to him. His brains were sprayed all over my Grandfather. And that's just one tidbit he shared, who knows what other atrocities he never shared.

He came back to Australia by a miracle with all limbs intact after 4 years in the trenches. He went on to have a successful business, but at what cost to his wife, his sons and future generations. It lives in me still.

It's not their fault.

[Eelco]

Thank you Sooz for sharing.

I too often forget to look at some of the causes that result in peoples actions and judge.
These days it seems that the meme is that its up to people themselves to be aware. When most I feel haven't a clue about how their experiences influence there actions and look on life.
Throw in a few well placed lies for good measure and you have your "shrug" sheeple.

With Love
Eelco

[Spiral]

Maybe a lot of things that cause mental & emotional problems as listed above are actually done on purpose for loosh production

[lookbeyond]

Maybe a lot of things that cause mental & emotional problems as listed above are actually done on purpose for loosh production

And i also wonder, if the theory is true, that we choose our parents/life for certain experiences, then possibly these difficulties we experience are useful to us in terms of spiritual development----yes, tried to explain this in simple terms to an unhappy teenage girl last evening as we went for a walk, sure is great in theory!

[Spiral]

And i also wonder, if the theory is true, that we choose our parents/life for certain experiences, then possibly these difficulties we experience are useful to us in terms of spiritual development----yes, tried to explain this in simple terms to an unhappy teenage girl last evening as we went for a walk, sure is great in theory!

Maybe we get given our parents for karmic reasons ? According to my past life memories (if they are real, its complicated lol) I was a bomber pilot in the RAF (WW2) in my previous life, and I lost so many friends that I swore an oath to turn my back on love, because it seemed like a destructive force from my POV (I have a memory of doing this) so I ended up with parents (specifically a mother, who is the most important in this regard) incapable of love. Sometimes its easier to see what something really is & does by its absence.

[lookbeyond]

Thanks for sharing Spiral, lb

[Eelco]

Heard an intriguing quote this morning about Lama's

I overheard they are like drums..
They need to be beat before a useful sound is produced.

So far Oh Purple one I am assuming You are a magic drum capable of producing sound on your own.

With Love
Eelco

[Spiral]

Heard an intriguing quote this morning about Lama's

I overheard they are like drums..
They need to be beat before a useful sound is produced.

So far Oh Purple one I am assuming You are a magic drum capable of producing sound on your own.

With Love
Eelco

That sounds a bit cruel, unless you mean the Dalai Lama, that endless grinning is a bit grating to say the least.

[modwiz]

And i also wonder, if the theory is true, that we choose our parents/life for certain experiences, then possibly these difficulties we experience are useful to us in terms of spiritual development----yes, tried to explain this in simple terms to an unhappy teenage girl last evening as we went for a walk, sure is great in theory!

I am sure I picked the two people who were going to be responsible for seeing to my peoper development. I chose people who would sit on me and hold me back until I was on my path enough to be able to not make youthful mistakes. Power is something most children do not have the emotional control to wield without things getting ugly. My parents were a gauntlet to run, of sorts. That means they were difficult. All went mostly to plan. Parenting is often hard for children and parents alike.

Holding onto grudges is more than useless. It is dysfunctional and destructive.

[modwiz]

Heard an intriguing quote this morning about Lama's

I overheard they are like drums..
They need to be beat before a useful sound is produced.

So far Oh Purple one I am assuming You are a magic drum capable of producing sound on your own.

With Love
Eelco

I don't understand what message is being delivered here. I am also unsure which lama you are referring to. The lama monk, or the llama animal?

Beating either one does little to improve my ability to understand why this post was made.

[PurpleLama]

Heard an intriguing quote this morning about Lama's

I overheard they are like drums..
They need to be beat before a useful sound is produced.

So far Oh Purple one I am assuming You are a magic drum capable of producing sound on your own.

With Love
Eelco

Mastery of the drum involves setting down the drum and laying the hands to rest.

Then it is the heart, the mind, the spirit, these each may make their percussion, and the balance of these makes the most wonderful rythyms.

[Eelco]

The quote was form a tibetan monk on the buddhist geek podcast.

So its about the lama monks. As we have a purple lama here these days that seems quite capable of producing sounds without beating.
I thought I'd share it in the tent he spends his time here..

That said it of course has me wondering. Do the beatings of life produce more usefull insights?
Is it possible to grow without one?

Beating of course being everything from a mild irritation to full on heardship and suffering.

With Love
Eelco

[Moonlight]

I spent time with my medicine drum last evening. It had been calling me for a while as I had been neglecting our time together. The good thing with winter is that I did not need to warm it up to get the humidity out, so there it was, ready and eager. The heartbeat is my favorite beat.

[lookbeyond]

I spent time with my medicine drum last evening. It had been calling me for a while as I had been neglecting our time together. The good thing with winter is that I did not need to warm it up to get the humidity out, so there it was, ready and eager. The heartbeat is my favorite beat.

Sounds like a wonderful way to spend time,lb