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Thread: Humour thread

  1. #421
    Senior Member NotAPretender's Avatar
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    “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.”

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  3. #422
    Administrator Aragorn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Dreamtimer View Post
    At first glance that photo was totally a woman. I had to look again to see that the face was not 'hers'.
    The original picture was of Queen Victoria, and her face didn't exactly come across as very feminine.


    = DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR =

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  5. #423
    Super Moderator United States Dreamtimer's Avatar
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    So it became Queen Dicktoria. I see now.

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  7. #424
    Super Moderator Norway Elen's Avatar
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    Her necklace is slightly off-center. Other than that...every strand of hair in place.
    Whatever is true. Whatever is noble. Whatever is right. Whatever is lovely. Whatever is admirable. Anything of excellence and worthy of praise. Dwell on these things. Jesus Christ (I agree)

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  9. #425
    Administrator Aragorn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Elen View Post
    Her necklace is slightly off-center. Other than that...every strand of hair in place.
    And it was all hers too!
    = DEATH BEFORE DISHONOR =

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  11. #426
    Super Moderator Wind's Avatar
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  13. #427
    Senior Member NotAPretender's Avatar
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    that guy is truly beyond description ...

    And so many people, not just Americans, identify with what he represents en toto, morals, intelligence, authoritarianism... How has humanity managed to survive. It proves there is a God looking out for us.

    Fools and idiots are high on the list of the Creator and St. Joseph of Cupertino.

    “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.”

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  15. #428
    Senior Member Russian Federation Malisa's Avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Aragorn View Post
    And it was all hers too!
    Maybe, maybe not, the first hair extensions come back from thousands of years, so i bet at her time there were some "tricks" going on as well

    And..... LOL

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  17. #429
    Super Moderator Wind's Avatar
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  19. #430
    Senior Member NotAPretender's Avatar
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    Someone on Quora asked "Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?" Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England wrote the following response:

    A few things spring to mind.

    Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem.

    For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed.

    So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump's limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief.

    Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing – not once, ever.

    I don't say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman.

    But with Trump, it's a fact. He doesn't even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty.

    Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers.

    And scarily, he doesn't just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness.

    There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It's all surface.

    Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront.

    Well, we don't. We see it as having no inner world, no soul.

    And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist.

    Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that.

    He's not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat.

    He's more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege.

    And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully.

    That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead.

    There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless – and he kicks them when they are down.

    So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a third – of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think 'Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy' is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that:

    • Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and mostly are.

    • You don't need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man.

    This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss.

    After all, it's impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum.

    God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid.

    He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart.

    In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Trump.

    And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumpfuls of hair and scream in anguish:

    'My God... what... have... I... created?

    If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set.
    “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.”

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  21. #431
    Super Moderator Wind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by NotAPretender View Post
    Trump - Jabba the Hutt of privilege.
    That list is so true.

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  23. #432
    Senior Member Russian Federation Malisa's Avatar
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    Quote Originally posted by Wind View Post
    Heeeeeyeeeeet!!!...

    I want to see :P

    Quote Originally posted by NotAPretender View Post


    Someone on Quora asked "Why do some British people not like Donald Trump?" Nate White, an articulate and witty writer from England wrote the following response:

    A few things spring to mind.

    Trump lacks certain qualities which the British traditionally esteem.

    For instance, he has no class, no charm, no coolness, no credibility, no compassion, no wit, no warmth, no wisdom, no subtlety, no sensitivity, no self-awareness, no humility, no honour and no grace – all qualities, funnily enough, with which his predecessor Mr. Obama was generously blessed.

    So for us, the stark contrast does rather throw Trump's limitations into embarrassingly sharp relief.

    Plus, we like a laugh. And while Trump may be laughable, he has never once said anything wry, witty or even faintly amusing – not once, ever.

    I don't say that rhetorically, I mean it quite literally: not once, not ever. And that fact is particularly disturbing to the British sensibility – for us, to lack humour is almost inhuman.

    But with Trump, it's a fact. He doesn't even seem to understand what a joke is – his idea of a joke is a crass comment, an illiterate insult, a casual act of cruelty.

    Trump is a troll. And like all trolls, he is never funny and he never laughs; he only crows or jeers.

    And scarily, he doesn't just talk in crude, witless insults – he actually thinks in them. His mind is a simple bot-like algorithm of petty prejudices and knee-jerk nastiness.

    There is never any under-layer of irony, complexity, nuance or depth. It's all surface.

    Some Americans might see this as refreshingly upfront.

    Well, we don't. We see it as having no inner world, no soul.

    And in Britain we traditionally side with David, not Goliath. All our heroes are plucky underdogs: Robin Hood, Dick Whittington, Oliver Twist.

    Trump is neither plucky, nor an underdog. He is the exact opposite of that.

    He's not even a spoiled rich-boy, or a greedy fat-cat.

    He's more a fat white slug. A Jabba the Hutt of privilege.

    And worse, he is that most unforgivable of all things to the British: a bully.

    That is, except when he is among bullies; then he suddenly transforms into a snivelling sidekick instead.

    There are unspoken rules to this stuff – the Queensberry rules of basic decency – and he breaks them all. He punches downwards – which a gentleman should, would, could never do – and every blow he aims is below the belt. He particularly likes to kick the vulnerable or voiceless – and he kicks them when they are down.

    So the fact that a significant minority – perhaps a third – of Americans look at what he does, listen to what he says, and then think 'Yeah, he seems like my kind of guy' is a matter of some confusion and no little distress to British people, given that:

    • Americans are supposed to be nicer than us, and mostly are.

    • You don't need a particularly keen eye for detail to spot a few flaws in the man.

    This last point is what especially confuses and dismays British people, and many other people too; his faults seem pretty bloody hard to miss.

    After all, it's impossible to read a single tweet, or hear him speak a sentence or two, without staring deep into the abyss. He turns being artless into an art form; he is a Picasso of pettiness; a Shakespeare of shit. His faults are fractal: even his flaws have flaws, and so on ad infinitum.

    God knows there have always been stupid people in the world, and plenty of nasty people too. But rarely has stupidity been so nasty, or nastiness so stupid.

    He makes Nixon look trustworthy and George W look smart.

    In fact, if Frankenstein decided to make a monster assembled entirely from human flaws – he would make a Trump.

    And a remorseful Doctor Frankenstein would clutch out big clumpfuls of hair and scream in anguish:

    'My God... what... have... I... created?

    If being a twat was a TV show, Trump would be the boxed set.
    Risking sounding terrible, i have to say that most of my friends in the UK and other "eastern countries" just call him "Jabba the Fat"

    I'm sorry LMAO

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  25. #433
    Senior Member NotAPretender's Avatar
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    I shall remember ...
    “If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way.”

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  27. #434
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  29. #435
    Super Moderator United States Dreamtimer's Avatar
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    Have a wee Puff...


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