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Dreamtimer
27th August 2015, 15:01
Our resident magic user Modwiz said,
We do not have an adult culture in the USA. And as this pernicious influence has spread across the globe, the maturity bar has been lowered.

This is true and a grave concern.

Has anyone noticed how commercials are appealing to us like small children? I hear variations on the Sesame Street theme, I see variations of learning shorts from the series turned into commercials. Some commercials literally sound like nursery rhyme melodies.

I hardly watch TV anymore so to see as much of it as I do is worrying.

My brother who is a very smart man has no trouble whatsoever using vapid and simplistic arguments. He has a very high opinion of himself and thinks it's funny to get people to believe stuff that's not true, or believe him when his argument is insubstantial. He contributes to the problem yet takes no responsibility to change it.

And then he has the gall to sit around with his republican friends talking about how some people just shouldn't have kids and why can't we just sterilize them.

Seriously? (That's a different kind of brain dead in my opinion)

My comfort and solace lies in having done a great deal of teaching, tutoring and day care. I've seen first hand that there are many very smart children with beautiful spirits and parents that are taking good care of them and teaching them to think for themselves.

They are our future. Teach them, as many of you that can. Show them wisdom and encourage them to think for themselves. And love them.

lcam88
27th August 2015, 15:09
+1 Dreamtimer

I think the issue you see with mental immaturity as you describe is a result of the education people are receiving.

Dreamtimer
27th August 2015, 15:35
lcam88, I would add the difficulty of parenting due to the lack of time caused by parents having to work so much. The extended family isn't around anymore to pick up the slack.

One of the reasons I don't teach anymore is the curriculum changes and the 'values'. Teaching to the test isn't doing any of us any good. It's not real education anymore and the only teachers who have room to be creative and really teach are the ones in the advanced classes. So we increase the division between the regular and the elite even in the public schools.

I'm personally a great fan of the Montessori system. The tools build on each other, children teach each other, ages are mixed, Teachers often teach in teams, and there's self-direction. The child makes a decision about which work they will do first. Maria Montessori's goal was "Peaceful children, Peaceful world".

Sadly, in education and in mainstream society, people are told what to think and what to do.

My brother was sitting with his same friends going on for five minutes about how people need to conform and how important it is to fit in. Finally I interjected reminding them that if they actually want creative thinking and entrepreneurship they'd better start encouraging people to think outside of the box and be different.

"Oh yes, well, of course, ... blah blah blah," they agreed. I really don't think they are aware of how often they contradict themselves and their stated positions.

Know thyself. I'm pretty sure self reflection is one of the last things my brother wants to engage in. A phrase he's used with me time and again: "I don't have time to think. I don't have time to listen."

I'm afraid he's not the only one.

modwiz
27th August 2015, 16:48
My age group did not grow up with Sesame Street. The group that did seem to have never left it behind and it is showing.

We have to find the collective will to shift and change ourselves. By maturing emotionally we will be better equipped to live in extended families once again as we will have ways to resolve our differences. A family of wounded "victims" are each looking for their own personal validation instead of seeing themselves as an organism that needs all of its parts functional and integrated to make the magic a family unit can. These same skills can then allow us to create vibrant communities of truly awake and aware individuals.

Entertainment and news (news is now legally defined as under the umbrella of entertainment in media companies) is a contrived distraction. Old fashioned live local music and other perfomance arts are not part of the opinion shaping mechanism. If a mega-corporation is offering us something, it is highly suspect. To say the least.

bsbray
27th August 2015, 18:07
This is a great issue and I'm glad you started a thread about it Dreamtimer.

If anyone goes back and watches American movies from the 1960's and especially earlier, and pays attention to how people interacted back then, the body language, the way disagreements were handled, it really seems to have been a much more mature world.

It's a calmness and clarity of mind that has been disturbed by instant gratification and 15-second television commercials. It's a self-assuredness that has been defiled by too much political correctness and too many character assassinations in the major media. Integrity is being replaced with artificial values. There is a general disrespect for the equal worth of a fellow human being, and no one seems to have time for the simple things in life anymore.

I'm not sure what the way out is, except maybe we need more role models today of people who have already found the solution to all of this. Whether it's a real historical person or a character in books or movies or whatever the case is, people need better role models than Lindsay Lohan and Bill O'Reilly. :fpalm:

lcam88
27th August 2015, 19:09
By education in the context above, I mean more specifically, critical thinking.

The point you make about parenting is a good one; I think there are other problems that arise because of poor parenting that perhaps result in a similar outcome. The desire to fit in and identify with a group specifically. A weaker family bonds may result in an individual who then tries to create a family around him with his/her peers who has been identified to be desirable (in terms of survival value).

Any other contributions to the herding effect?

1) Real or apparent authority over something

2) Uncertainty or indecision leading to a "follow mode"

3) Real or apparent environmental or circumstantial hostility leading to procurement of security. Fear of some kind.

4) Self esteem or self image issues

5) Behavioral or Cultural values

I still think education worthy of consideration in contemplation of these types of growth.

Jeffrey W.
27th August 2015, 19:32
I'm 30 years old, former Marine, college educated. I'd consider myself to be a gentleman not a child. I guess the child-like behavior can be exacerbated by the online anonymous communities. Adults no longer have to be held accountable for what they say, so they regress more often. Just a thought.

Dreamtimer
27th August 2015, 20:59
Jeffrey W., I believe you're right about the anonymity making people feel 'free' to behave in ways they wouldn't in person. As an aside, I like to distinguish childish from child-like. Childish is the selfish, immature, temper tantrum, etc. type behavior. Child-like is being able to retain the openness and wonder in life, to be able to relax and have fun and play. I'm very glad to hear you're a gentleman. They're sometimes hard to find.

lcam88, you're right about the critical thinking. I run into that all the time. People just want to throw out lines and talking points and there's no depth of thought or even understanding of what each other is saying. One of the things that was really important to us was to send our son to a school that had critical thinking as an integral part of all programs. It was a foundational part of the school's mission.

I used to think home-schooling was mostly religious people but I now know many young people who are home-schooling for many reasons including critical thinking and socialization (and safety) issues. Also, private (and charter) schools are expensive.

I feel pretty strongly that people give up a lot of their personal responsibility to authority because then they don't bear the burden of that responsibility.

"My (fill-in-the-blank) told me to." Or,

"I'm just being a good (fill-in-the-blank)".

idigress
27th August 2015, 21:15
My age group did not grow up with Sesame Street. The group that did seem to have never left it behind and it is showing.

We have to find the collective will to shift and change ourselves.

Modwiz, you are SPOT ON. We need to help each other develop conscious awareness about how our energy shows up in our lives and how it impacts/affects others.

I'm going out on a very long and high limb here, but I think me joining the TOT forum was a fortuitous coincidence. The reason I say this is that is that I believe in core energy coaching(TM) developed and pioneered by Dr. Bruce Schneider, founder of the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) Link: http://www.ipeccoaching.com. I'm not here advertising for business, especially as a coach because that wouldn't be right. Besides, I'm not fully functional (my listening skills and speaking ability suck big time) and I wouldn't attempt to coach anyone, especially for money! But I digress...

Dr. Schneider's energy leadership construct is designed to help people shift from the lower levels of catabolic energy to anabolic energy so that they can "get out of their own way" of what's stopping them or keeping them stuck. Catabolic: Level 1 - The Victim and Level 2 - The Fighter. Some of Level 3 - The Rationalizer is also considered catabolic but it's the starting point from which to move into anabolic energy: Level 3 as mentioned, Level 4 - The Care Giver, Level 5 - The Opportunist, Level 6 - The Visionary, and finally, Level 7 - The Creator. Energy Leadership is quite fascenating ;)

Here's a link to a core energy coach company that has posted some informative, short videos on energy leadership. Link: http://www.careercoach.com/energy-leadership-index/. Note, I'm not advertising for them. The only thing we have in common is in our coach training program - iPEC's Energy Leadership. There are lots of us who have gone through this training and credentialed as "Certified Professional Coach" in line with the International Coach Federation (ICF) standards of excellence.

Dang, as usual, I've overwhelmed my self in my excitement to share about energy leadership. I hope I have not offended anyone and again, this is not an advertisement for any business, although I do believe in Dr. Bruce Schneider's Energy Leadership and ICF-approved coach training program. Mods, please remove/edit/etc. this post if I have overstepped boundaries. Not my intention.

ANYWAY, I'm so glad I found you all, my heart is so very happy :)

bsbray
27th August 2015, 22:05
I looked up this guy on YouTube out of curiosity, idigress, and found these videos. So maybe someone else would be interested in watching them as well:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbrmwtRhu8I


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BJwPBuoq8gI

idigress
27th August 2015, 22:10
I looked up this guy on YouTube out of curiosity, idigress, and found these videos. So maybe someone else would be interested in watching them as well:

Excellent!!!

Dreamtimer
27th August 2015, 22:47
A minute into the first video I realized I must play this for my husband. He can really put this to use personally and professionally. Thanks, bsbray and idigress:)

idigress
27th August 2015, 23:41
A minute into the first video I realized I must play this for my husband. He can really put this to use personally and professionally. Thanks, bsbray and idigress:)

Lol, I love your reason for editing ;)

More info from the EL creator: Dr. Schneider's personal website
http://www.energyleadership.com/leadership-development-program.html

Article "Key Factors for Success"
http://www.ipeccoaching.com/UploadData/PDFs/Key-Factor-For-Success2011.pdf

Anyway, I know a number of coaches who can knock your socks off with Energy Leadership Coaching. Again, I get nothing from referring folks to them, I'm just am really impressed with these three women, both of whom I know personally. However, they would not recognize me with me moniker 'idigress' :)

Wendy Perrill's We Empower Consciousness (specializing in empowering women, soul coaching and service excellence - she and I attended the same cadre of iPEC training in Dallas, TX)
http://wppec.com

Sara Bell's Breakthrough Leadership Coaching (specializing in coaching women leaders - she and I attended the same cadre do IPEC training in Dallas, Tx)
http://bellscoaching.com
http://youtu.be/an39oZ5M0O8

Sandi Mitchell's APEX Leadership Coaching (specializing in helping you find your inner genius & leadership coaching - she and I attended business coaching training in California)
http://www.apexleadershipcoaching.com/inner-genius-coach/

here's another article about employee engagement; i do not personally know anyone in this company, i just know about their insightful articles on energy leadership :)

Eileen P. Monesson's PRCounts
http://prcounts.com/uploads/NJSCPA_2013_Convention_-_The_Benefits_of_a_Anabolic_Leader_Workbook.pdf


Check them out

Cearna
28th August 2015, 10:02
I'm not going to be learned here, just speak from observation as a teacher at an OZ High school for close on 40 years.

Yes, I am of the older generation, who began learning their times table by rote, but in primary school, we were writing for composition about 1 1/2 - 2 pages, I found this out when in my 30's my great aunt gave me my composition book from when I was 8 years old, one was about my pet, my cat, I had never had a pet so surely creative imagination was in play then, but do you know we would never have written in the way people do now on TOT, because we were very humble people at school, in the days just after the war, and the topics of study we had bear no resemblance to what you people have obviously either studied at school or have followed for your own needs. The conversations were of children from poorly educated families at home, my mother being one of these and all of her family, yet my fathers family, might only meet at birthdays and funerals and that was another story altogether, their own families later on went on to Higher Education and the Highest level of career they could achieve coming from whatever the family could afford. Soto some extent, we become what our family and society are in our own generation.

It is not as simple as that, it then goes on to a great degree as far as I was concerned to the level of love we received as children and how we grew up, my mother was socially inept, and afraid of her standing as a mother in the eyes of those around her, so we were kept inside to mind ourselves, but with plenty of household chores, no television, we didn't have one till I was 21, only radio as an entertainment or in our case a gramophone, we did not learn social interaction, nor peer interaction we simply learnt "do as your told". We were never given hugs or kisses, no mention of "I love you" and so we were not able to pass on any of that to my sisters two children, but they were allowed to go out and mix and do things, so they grew up, more able to cope in life. The only love I ever got was from my dad and my great aunt, so I was ready to show what love I could to her children, but this all impinges on the maturity of a child, for in the families of the "baby boomers" you could see a huge change, far more family oriented, more social interaction and more mature children. At school I noted, that those girls who loved their mother, would be readily able to sit in my classes and we could really learn and enjoy the classes, they liked me as I'm a sort of mother figure, but the girls who hated their mothers frequently had outbursts to me, like "I hate you, you are just like my mother" and their need was to talk to one another about when we go out to the pub on the weekend. My empathy had difficulty handling this.

The next thing was the school they attended, and their degree of goal orientation. At the public schools it was difficult to teach, unless there was a real love of the subject in the student, but when I went to teach by Correspondence, suddenly it was a whole new ball game, because these students for the most part, really loved the subjects I teach and wanted a career, usually in design when they left school - a cut throat business and only the best get in to go on to study. Although Textiles seems to be a practical subject and Home Science as well, in the senior classes they are quite well laced in physics and chemistry and difficult to understand to relevance till you begin to find out this is what it is all about, yet they worked and worked and their practical stuff was so creative, we were astounded. Still the students that came to us from Christian Small Schools and the Steiner Schools had a degree that was not the same as in the students from public High Schools, their whole approach to everything was so much more mature and more creative.

Then the syllabus changed right throughout the NSW Education system, where before so much was expected in the Public exams like the Higher School Certificate. Suddenly the material being written for sending out to our students - also being written by younger teachers, was like kindergarten compared to junior High School. What was expected, instead of full length answers going into pages long, suddenly became short answer questions of a line or two where examiners only looked for one word or a phrase and the long answers were about half a page. The students suddenly could not discuss a topic in depth or write in sentences to show their own mental progress. After this came I phones and texting, so they don"t even write in complete words, and from what I hear of the conversations outside my home as they go home from school most of their words are foul to one another, but they are not all of this generation, there are still those who are achievers, who are in the top bracket and mostly are those that have parents who help and guide and give them love and affection. So it is not all the dumbing down of fluoride or chemicals in the food and GMO's. So many of these students are living a lifestyle, that older people cannot come to terms with.

Outside in our street, the seniors are coming to school in often their own cars, one taxi driver was fuming when he picked me up, about parents who either allow their son to drive a red sports car at 18 years old, others tell me of taking old ladies to shop in the afternoons, and they are badly harrassed by students in the main street, with a police car standing next to them doing nothing (because they are not allowed to) and these old ladies are terrified to do their shopping, last week junior students on sports day were wagging school, somewhere in the bushes behind our house, came into our yard and stole my chair, I heard them going back to school to get their bus, but didn't know about the chair at the time, they live in an entirely different world, and we are allowing them to become what they are, yet I believe they are often more loved than we ever were. How this has come about could be from the use of technology, since the computer does a lot of what our minds used to have to do for us.

idigress
28th August 2015, 11:27
Cearna, thank you for sharing your story, love that your writing is so fluid and descriptive. We are a product of our upbringing and environment, so they say :). That yours was filled with so many challenges in and outside the home speaks volumes as to how you've overcome them to be the gifted and generous woman you are today. It's definitely not easy going through life as it were, experiencing it from the outside looking in but you persevered - you are a tenacious one! (As a side note, I sense there are a few of us in the TOT forum that lived our lives as as if we were on the outside looking in.)

As a teacher, you observe first hand how through the years, the proverbial goal posts have been moved closer, and the act of learning is no longer adequately challenging for them. Meaning that gradual changes in curriculum as well as how we educate our children seem produce(?) young adults who aren't as prepared for life as we were at their age. If you could change one thing in today's education system, what would that be? How would you go about making that change?

lcam88
28th August 2015, 14:27
Energy Leadership Coaching:

I'm glad you find meaning in it. Fundamentally, it is a crutch [as is everything else really], use it while you need it but don't feel obligated to cling to it. Baby bird must fly from the nest, one day.

lcam88
28th August 2015, 14:36
...came into our yard and stole my chair...

Oh the thrill, the excitement, the spontaneity, the danger! The value of success victory and the admiring eyes of the that girl!

I hope you eventually got the chair back.


...and we are allowing them to become what they are, yet I believe they are often more loved than we ever were. How this has come about could be from the use of technology, since the computer does a lot of what our minds used to have to do for us.

Kids will be kids. And they need to find out who they are, just like the rest of us. Sometimes invincibility is just as delicate an illusion to maintain as self image before our friends.

I think Dreamtimer is on to something quite profound: family bonds.

idigress
28th August 2015, 16:21
Energy Leadership Coaching:

I'm glad you find meaning in it. Fundamentally, it is a crutch [as is everything else really], use it while you need it but don't feel obligated to cling to it. Baby bird must fly from the nest, one day.

Thanks for your feedback :) Lol, EL is not so much a 'crutch' as it is one of many 'tools' in my backpack I employ to gain a better understanding of others, be it in work-related settings or life in general. I'm a big fan of other tools that provide me with insights as to the inner workings of a person's personality, character, leadership style, learning style, and more.

:hug: :group hug: :unity:

ZShawn
28th August 2015, 16:46
compassion
benevolence
competence
These 3 qualities are a great measure for maturity.

However, the ability to comprehend another is a quality that seems to be in short supply.... there is a lot of communicating going on, but often people will childishly just react to what they think they are perceiving, and launch into a reaction based on that assumption, which is really only just an interpretation which biased perceptual filter systems will produce....

As children, we are all sponges which absorb behaviors and -isms, and ideas from whomever we are exposed to in childhood, and often the flavors of that exposure never leave an individual, and such continue on reacting for the rest of their days, never really seeing how programmed their "individual behavior" really was, as things that close to the core programming are never really considered by any but a few individuals who are perceptive enough to notice.


If there ever will be a Just Society emerge from the barbarous hordes, the ability to communicate effectively is paramount in this process.

idigress
28th August 2015, 17:28
compassion
benevolence
competence
These 3 qualities are a great measure for maturity.

However, the ability to comprehend another is a quality that seems to be in short supply.... there is a lot of communicating going on, but often people will childishly just react to what they think they are perceiving, and launch into a reaction based on that assumption, which is really only just an interpretation which biased perceptual filter systems will produce....

As children, we are all sponges which absorb behaviors and -isms, and ideas from whomever we are exposed to in childhood, and often the flavors of that exposure never leave an individual, and such continue on reacting for the rest of their days, never really seeing how programmed their "individual behavior" really was, as things that close to the core programming are never really considered by any but a few individuals who are perceptive enough to notice.


If there ever will be a Just Society emerge from the barbarous hordes, the ability to communicate effectively is paramount in this process.

Indeed. Likewise as are giving and receiving feedback. Nigel Bristow, author of "Where's the gift?" describes how feedback often comes wrapped in an unsightly package with many layers of complexity that, like an onion, must be peeled back to find the 'gift' in that message. Here's an example from a time when I was leading a team of designers - I gave them all this book to read (it's about a 30-minute read but the message is so simple yet so profound). A single mother of a 7 year old child came happily bouncing into my office the next morning, so excited to share her breakthrough with her son who had been acting out in school and misbehaving at home. She told me that instead of being reactive to her son's anger and fussing, she decided to find the gift he was giving her. She began asking questions (peeling back the layers) as to why he felt and misbehaved and after a few minutes, he calmly told her that he was angry that she wasn't spending more time with him. Because, you see, she was working long hours on a very important project that took her away from spending quality time with her son. At that moment, she realized the message her son was trying to give her was "mom, I really need you and miss you." She validated his feelings and he went from anger to peace when he realized his mom finally HEARD him. She said the moment was amazing! I still get goosebumps when I recall her experience ;)

Finding the gift in the feedback we receive isn't always easy but it's well worth the effort.

lcam88
28th August 2015, 18:23
...to gain a better understanding of others.

I see.

I actually thought it was about understanding one's self, perhaps by stimulating us to examine our [energetic] footprint that we leave behind. Hmmm.

It seems that...


...the ability to comprehend another is a quality that seems to be in short supply

... insofar as I didn't glean the same value(s) you did. :/

I'm not trying to suggest that crutches are a bad thing. They can be very useful.

ZShawn, please don't take the following comments to be a personal criticism though I must confess it may carry a rather confrontational tone, even though I did really censor the more radical posturing. Its food for thought only.


If there ever will be a Just Society emerge from the barbarous hordes, the ability to communicate effectively is paramount in this process.

Good luck with that. I don't think barbarous hordes should be very interested in "communicating effectively" without the proper formalities (thumb screws, iron maidens crocodile shears, waterboards, handcuffs, electrodes or whatever happens to be in particular favor). Or do I have it the other way around?

Maybe compassion, benevolence, competence are just words given subjective meanings to whoever wields them at a given moment? Hmmm?

It is reasonable to think that an aging person should attribute these qualities to themselves as they face their own morality. They start thinking about their legacy, about how they will be remembered in society, and by their family and friends.

But the issue still remains, maturity is just as subjective a term as any one of the three terms above, I suppose. Wasn't torturing a "heretic" to death an act of mercy performed by clerics?

From that angle, I think a "just society" is something to be avoided like the plague. Do you happen to know what justice means?

idigress
28th August 2015, 18:46
I see.

I actually thought it was about understanding one's self, perhaps by stimulating us to examine our [energetic] footprint that we leave behind. Hmmm.

Yes, it is about understanding one's self. It's also about understanding others. It's also about understanding how others understand the people and world that surrounds them. And much much more. Why set limits on the application of such a meaningful tool?

On this big beautiful blue marble we call earth, we all are interrelated, interconnected, and interdependent. We all seek to understand others as well as to be understood. Oh, the humanity ;)

lcam88
28th August 2015, 19:39
I agree with you, idigress.

Cearna
29th August 2015, 10:57
*As a youngster we begin to show what we are especially, what direction your Pathway is to take you for e.g. I came to be a teacher, but I went into school teaching, because my sister did it and I could see few other alternatives - right direction, but wrong kind of teaching. I think the children show you in the early years, but up till now we have been led by what society told us should be and we missed the guideposts, so more need to watch and listen, and not turn them "off"

* we really must allow them to develop their own giftedness in ways of seeing, feeling, creativity, and not stereotype.

* one of my bug bears at school was having to teach craft, every student had to do 3 40 minute periods of craft and they all had to go in turn to each type of craft. So I had a mixed class of 20 boys and girls, what on earth was I to do with those boys in a sewing class. One of the boys solved the problem for me, he wanted to make cricket "thigh pads" which I knew nothing about, but he did, so between us we worked out how to go about it, the other boys then asked could they make what they wanted to make and we worked on it together, we progressed to T-shirts and track suits, they were no problems in class. The year 7 boys (about 12-13) had to make an apron to wear in cookery and wood work and metal work class. For 6 months they had to do sewing. I was completely amazed, with the solution to that one. I had 1 Elna machine, 1 Brother machine, 2 Bernina's and 2 Husquavarnas. the other teachers were not impressed with such a mixed bag, but I showed them that the Husquavarnas had gears, which allowed then to sew slowly and carefully without doing in the engines. I took the work of half the class home to pin and tack if my mother helped me, so when they arrived at least half the class had work they could go straight to and it was easy to follow, few mistakes, the other half of the class lined up to see me to do the next stage. Ok. what happened - I arrived, after recess to find these boys had forgone their recess to get in line outside the door, so they could race in (they ran in to class) to get their machine of choice - usually the Husquavana. They were happy, I was happy, the mums were happy from many reasons one being their money wasn't wasted. It became the same amongst the girls, if I had a lot of their work ready, so they could go straight to it and because it was carefully and properly put together for them, then in the end the garment fitted, some of these were accomplished and talented sewers, and they were not wasting their time waiting to get to see me. discipline was better, except for the ones who were there hoping to get out of work. The student could be proud of what they had achieved, it was wearable, no money was wasted and the parents started to turn up in droves on parent teacher night full of how wonderful their children were. When other teachers took over some of the classes the results were minimal and the class sizes dropped, and no one was happy.

When I started to teach for the Technical and Further Education classes for people from 18 years on, by Correspondence, another story, these were the school drop outs for some reason or another, who were back to get their Higher School Certificate because jobs were getting scarce and people needed more qualifications. These had low self esteem usually, were used to being the failures at school. some were single parents, or were older and coming back to see if they could start to learn again. One thing we had always done at the Correspondence School was to send out a letter with every lot of work so that they knew they were not just a number but we took care to get to know them and in fact be a person to them. I did the same thing at the TAFE, sent out a letter, to talk to them, and let them know I needed them to talk to me, i received so many letters from students, saying I was they only one who did this and they really appreciated it, and this is a huge part of what school is not about. Many of them, I discovered could not really differentiate what to look for exactly in doing their work, so to some I sent letters explaining how they might go about this, then to all I sent a couple of pages explaining in other words what the question was about, how they might find the information, and what I was looking for for a full answer, but also let them know that if they didn't read this letter and just did their own thing, I wouldn't accept this at all. The point in this to give help and encouragement but to lay down boundaries against trying to put one over me with some flimsy excuse - if I got that, I made them re-do. Then they received a full answer from me on what their answers should have contained and why. In correspondence, we have a lot of drop outs, because, it is hard to learn to work by yourself, but I also had some who went the extra mile, for they began to not only want to, they found the need to look for more than just what was required, and they really came into their own self, from doing so, in fact were thrilled with their own achievement. Most of my students completed the course we were doing, from this personal approach and the sense that someone cared if they learnt or not. From the newsletters I received from our High School (they keep the residents of our street informed of what is going on in their school which I live next door to) they seem to also have a really caring and different approach to how to run a school now, yet outside OMG!!!!!!!!!

One of my own teachers taught me more about teaching than I ever learnt in Teacher's college. We were at tennis during sport time, and she came to talk to me - she taught me history and English a lovely old dear, and she said "do you know, I've been looking at your work and I believe you are capable of doing a great deal better than you have been, will you try to do better for me". I had always been led to believe at home that I was a bit of a dead loss and my sister always believed she was brainier than myself, so I had no reason to try, but for her I did. In the next half year I gained 16 places in class. Later in my life a school inspector wanted to send me to a one teacher of Home Science small school , but insisted I should go to more studies but my lack of belief in my ability held me back, and she insisted she knew better than I, so I did go on and found I could do it after all. So I think in amongst all this wondrous entertainment and new means of teaching, a lot boils down to making boundaries which don't seem to be a part of life any more, become a listener and observer of each one and treat them as if you care, (ie if they ever allow you to in between the bad behaviour) and treat each person as an individual with a sovereignty of their own. If you do they soon make you a part of their family. It helps to know their great love in life is to become a ballerina, or I want to go on to become >>>>> In one school, of only 60 girl students, there was absolutely nothing for them outside in life, so I taught those interested to play hockey, and we joined the hockey association where I played and refereed. They had to travel a long distance to play and we had to set up special times for them to play, and they started at the bottom , but they went from C reserve to c grade to B reserve by winning each year and they will never forget that team they played in for 4 years. They also, in class, if I got to school late from my exhaughst pipe falling off once again, would start off their class on their own, one would take over as teacher and everything was underway and going smoothly when I finally got there (I travelled 30 miles each way to school). I had no family of my own so I had the time to put into what I did and I would not be expecting other teachers to do the same, for me discipline was a problem, so I had to find ways to make them want to work and not play up - bribery maybe, but in those classes I at least was happier and so were they.

You may be able to see where this fits in to today's youth.