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Thread: Adult Society

  1. #1
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    Adult Society

    Our resident magic user Modwiz said,
    We do not have an adult culture in the USA. And as this pernicious influence has spread across the globe, the maturity bar has been lowered.
    This is true and a grave concern.

    Has anyone noticed how commercials are appealing to us like small children? I hear variations on the Sesame Street theme, I see variations of learning shorts from the series turned into commercials. Some commercials literally sound like nursery rhyme melodies.

    I hardly watch TV anymore so to see as much of it as I do is worrying.

    My brother who is a very smart man has no trouble whatsoever using vapid and simplistic arguments. He has a very high opinion of himself and thinks it's funny to get people to believe stuff that's not true, or believe him when his argument is insubstantial. He contributes to the problem yet takes no responsibility to change it.

    And then he has the gall to sit around with his republican friends talking about how some people just shouldn't have kids and why can't we just sterilize them.

    Seriously? (That's a different kind of brain dead in my opinion)

    My comfort and solace lies in having done a great deal of teaching, tutoring and day care. I've seen first hand that there are many very smart children with beautiful spirits and parents that are taking good care of them and teaching them to think for themselves.

    They are our future. Teach them, as many of you that can. Show them wisdom and encourage them to think for themselves. And love them.

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    +1 Dreamtimer

    I think the issue you see with mental immaturity as you describe is a result of the education people are receiving.

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    lcam88, I would add the difficulty of parenting due to the lack of time caused by parents having to work so much. The extended family isn't around anymore to pick up the slack.

    One of the reasons I don't teach anymore is the curriculum changes and the 'values'. Teaching to the test isn't doing any of us any good. It's not real education anymore and the only teachers who have room to be creative and really teach are the ones in the advanced classes. So we increase the division between the regular and the elite even in the public schools.

    I'm personally a great fan of the Montessori system. The tools build on each other, children teach each other, ages are mixed, Teachers often teach in teams, and there's self-direction. The child makes a decision about which work they will do first. Maria Montessori's goal was "Peaceful children, Peaceful world".

    Sadly, in education and in mainstream society, people are told what to think and what to do.

    My brother was sitting with his same friends going on for five minutes about how people need to conform and how important it is to fit in. Finally I interjected reminding them that if they actually want creative thinking and entrepreneurship they'd better start encouraging people to think outside of the box and be different.

    "Oh yes, well, of course, ... blah blah blah," they agreed. I really don't think they are aware of how often they contradict themselves and their stated positions.

    Know thyself. I'm pretty sure self reflection is one of the last things my brother wants to engage in. A phrase he's used with me time and again: "I don't have time to think. I don't have time to listen."

    I'm afraid he's not the only one.

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    My age group did not grow up with Sesame Street. The group that did seem to have never left it behind and it is showing.

    We have to find the collective will to shift and change ourselves. By maturing emotionally we will be better equipped to live in extended families once again as we will have ways to resolve our differences. A family of wounded "victims" are each looking for their own personal validation instead of seeing themselves as an organism that needs all of its parts functional and integrated to make the magic a family unit can. These same skills can then allow us to create vibrant communities of truly awake and aware individuals.

    Entertainment and news (news is now legally defined as under the umbrella of entertainment in media companies) is a contrived distraction. Old fashioned live local music and other perfomance arts are not part of the opinion shaping mechanism. If a mega-corporation is offering us something, it is highly suspect. To say the least.
    "To learn who rules over you simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize" -- Voltaire

    "Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."-- Eleanor Roosevelt

    "Misery loves company. Wisdom has to look for it." -- Anonymous

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    This is a great issue and I'm glad you started a thread about it Dreamtimer.

    If anyone goes back and watches American movies from the 1960's and especially earlier, and pays attention to how people interacted back then, the body language, the way disagreements were handled, it really seems to have been a much more mature world.

    It's a calmness and clarity of mind that has been disturbed by instant gratification and 15-second television commercials. It's a self-assuredness that has been defiled by too much political correctness and too many character assassinations in the major media. Integrity is being replaced with artificial values. There is a general disrespect for the equal worth of a fellow human being, and no one seems to have time for the simple things in life anymore.

    I'm not sure what the way out is, except maybe we need more role models today of people who have already found the solution to all of this. Whether it's a real historical person or a character in books or movies or whatever the case is, people need better role models than Lindsay Lohan and Bill O'Reilly.

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    By education in the context above, I mean more specifically, critical thinking.

    The point you make about parenting is a good one; I think there are other problems that arise because of poor parenting that perhaps result in a similar outcome. The desire to fit in and identify with a group specifically. A weaker family bonds may result in an individual who then tries to create a family around him with his/her peers who has been identified to be desirable (in terms of survival value).

    Any other contributions to the herding effect?

    1) Real or apparent authority over something

    2) Uncertainty or indecision leading to a "follow mode"

    3) Real or apparent environmental or circumstantial hostility leading to procurement of security. Fear of some kind.

    4) Self esteem or self image issues

    5) Behavioral or Cultural values

    I still think education worthy of consideration in contemplation of these types of growth.

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    I'm 30 years old, former Marine, college educated. I'd consider myself to be a gentleman not a child. I guess the child-like behavior can be exacerbated by the online anonymous communities. Adults no longer have to be held accountable for what they say, so they regress more often. Just a thought.

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    Jeffrey W., I believe you're right about the anonymity making people feel 'free' to behave in ways they wouldn't in person. As an aside, I like to distinguish childish from child-like. Childish is the selfish, immature, temper tantrum, etc. type behavior. Child-like is being able to retain the openness and wonder in life, to be able to relax and have fun and play. I'm very glad to hear you're a gentleman. They're sometimes hard to find.

    lcam88, you're right about the critical thinking. I run into that all the time. People just want to throw out lines and talking points and there's no depth of thought or even understanding of what each other is saying. One of the things that was really important to us was to send our son to a school that had critical thinking as an integral part of all programs. It was a foundational part of the school's mission.

    I used to think home-schooling was mostly religious people but I now know many young people who are home-schooling for many reasons including critical thinking and socialization (and safety) issues. Also, private (and charter) schools are expensive.

    I feel pretty strongly that people give up a lot of their personal responsibility to authority because then they don't bear the burden of that responsibility.

    "My (fill-in-the-blank) told me to." Or,

    "I'm just being a good (fill-in-the-blank)".

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    Happy Energy Leadership & Core Energy Coaching Construct

    Quote Originally posted by modwiz View Post
    My age group did not grow up with Sesame Street. The group that did seem to have never left it behind and it is showing.

    We have to find the collective will to shift and change ourselves.
    Modwiz, you are SPOT ON. We need to help each other develop conscious awareness about how our energy shows up in our lives and how it impacts/affects others.

    I'm going out on a very long and high limb here, but I think me joining the TOT forum was a fortuitous coincidence. The reason I say this is that is that I believe in core energy coaching(TM) developed and pioneered by Dr. Bruce Schneider, founder of the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC) Link: http://www.ipeccoaching.com. I'm not here advertising for business, especially as a coach because that wouldn't be right. Besides, I'm not fully functional (my listening skills and speaking ability suck big time) and I wouldn't attempt to coach anyone, especially for money! But I digress...

    Dr. Schneider's energy leadership construct is designed to help people shift from the lower levels of catabolic energy to anabolic energy so that they can "get out of their own way" of what's stopping them or keeping them stuck. Catabolic: Level 1 - The Victim and Level 2 - The Fighter. Some of Level 3 - The Rationalizer is also considered catabolic but it's the starting point from which to move into anabolic energy: Level 3 as mentioned, Level 4 - The Care Giver, Level 5 - The Opportunist, Level 6 - The Visionary, and finally, Level 7 - The Creator. Energy Leadership is quite fascenating

    Here's a link to a core energy coach company that has posted some informative, short videos on energy leadership. Link: http://www.careercoach.com/energy-leadership-index/. Note, I'm not advertising for them. The only thing we have in common is in our coach training program - iPEC's Energy Leadership. There are lots of us who have gone through this training and credentialed as "Certified Professional Coach" in line with the International Coach Federation (ICF) standards of excellence.

    Dang, as usual, I've overwhelmed my self in my excitement to share about energy leadership. I hope I have not offended anyone and again, this is not an advertisement for any business, although I do believe in Dr. Bruce Schneider's Energy Leadership and ICF-approved coach training program. Mods, please remove/edit/etc. this post if I have overstepped boundaries. Not my intention.

    ANYWAY, I'm so glad I found you all, my heart is so very happy
    Last edited by idigress, 27th August 2015 at 20:20. Reason: sentence construction and title

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    I looked up this guy on YouTube out of curiosity, idigress, and found these videos. So maybe someone else would be interested in watching them as well:


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    Quote Originally posted by bsbray View Post
    I looked up this guy on YouTube out of curiosity, idigress, and found these videos. So maybe someone else would be interested in watching them as well:
    Excellent!!!
    Last edited by bsbray, 27th August 2015 at 21:55. Reason: Quote BB code problem

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    A minute into the first video I realized I must play this for my husband. He can really put this to use personally and professionally. Thanks, bsbray and idigress
    Last edited by Dreamtimer, 27th August 2015 at 21:53. Reason: anabolic inclusiveness

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    Quote Originally posted by Dreamtimer View Post
    A minute into the first video I realized I must play this for my husband. He can really put this to use personally and professionally. Thanks, bsbray and idigress
    Lol, I love your reason for editing

    More info from the EL creator: Dr. Schneider's personal website
    http://www.energyleadership.com/lead...t-program.html

    Article "Key Factors for Success"
    http://www.ipeccoaching.com/UploadDa...uccess2011.pdf

    Anyway, I know a number of coaches who can knock your socks off with Energy Leadership Coaching. Again, I get nothing from referring folks to them, I'm just am really impressed with these three women, both of whom I know personally. However, they would not recognize me with me moniker 'idigress'

    Wendy Perrill's We Empower Consciousness (specializing in empowering women, soul coaching and service excellence - she and I attended the same cadre of iPEC training in Dallas, TX)
    http://wppec.com

    Sara Bell's Breakthrough Leadership Coaching (specializing in coaching women leaders - she and I attended the same cadre do IPEC training in Dallas, Tx)
    http://bellscoaching.com
    http://youtu.be/an39oZ5M0O8

    Sandi Mitchell's APEX Leadership Coaching (specializing in helping you find your inner genius & leadership coaching - she and I attended business coaching training in California)
    http://www.apexleadershipcoaching.co...-genius-coach/

    here's another article about employee engagement; i do not personally know anyone in this company, i just know about their insightful articles on energy leadership

    Eileen P. Monesson's PRCounts
    http://prcounts.com/uploads/NJSCPA_2...r_Workbook.pdf


    Check them out
    Last edited by idigress, 28th August 2015 at 11:08. Reason: adding link to article Key Factors for Success; added Wendy Perrill & reorganized paragraphs

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    I'm not going to be learned here, just speak from observation as a teacher at an OZ High school for close on 40 years.

    Yes, I am of the older generation, who began learning their times table by rote, but in primary school, we were writing for composition about 1 1/2 - 2 pages, I found this out when in my 30's my great aunt gave me my composition book from when I was 8 years old, one was about my pet, my cat, I had never had a pet so surely creative imagination was in play then, but do you know we would never have written in the way people do now on TOT, because we were very humble people at school, in the days just after the war, and the topics of study we had bear no resemblance to what you people have obviously either studied at school or have followed for your own needs. The conversations were of children from poorly educated families at home, my mother being one of these and all of her family, yet my fathers family, might only meet at birthdays and funerals and that was another story altogether, their own families later on went on to Higher Education and the Highest level of career they could achieve coming from whatever the family could afford. Soto some extent, we become what our family and society are in our own generation.

    It is not as simple as that, it then goes on to a great degree as far as I was concerned to the level of love we received as children and how we grew up, my mother was socially inept, and afraid of her standing as a mother in the eyes of those around her, so we were kept inside to mind ourselves, but with plenty of household chores, no television, we didn't have one till I was 21, only radio as an entertainment or in our case a gramophone, we did not learn social interaction, nor peer interaction we simply learnt "do as your told". We were never given hugs or kisses, no mention of "I love you" and so we were not able to pass on any of that to my sisters two children, but they were allowed to go out and mix and do things, so they grew up, more able to cope in life. The only love I ever got was from my dad and my great aunt, so I was ready to show what love I could to her children, but this all impinges on the maturity of a child, for in the families of the "baby boomers" you could see a huge change, far more family oriented, more social interaction and more mature children. At school I noted, that those girls who loved their mother, would be readily able to sit in my classes and we could really learn and enjoy the classes, they liked me as I'm a sort of mother figure, but the girls who hated their mothers frequently had outbursts to me, like "I hate you, you are just like my mother" and their need was to talk to one another about when we go out to the pub on the weekend. My empathy had difficulty handling this.

    The next thing was the school they attended, and their degree of goal orientation. At the public schools it was difficult to teach, unless there was a real love of the subject in the student, but when I went to teach by Correspondence, suddenly it was a whole new ball game, because these students for the most part, really loved the subjects I teach and wanted a career, usually in design when they left school - a cut throat business and only the best get in to go on to study. Although Textiles seems to be a practical subject and Home Science as well, in the senior classes they are quite well laced in physics and chemistry and difficult to understand to relevance till you begin to find out this is what it is all about, yet they worked and worked and their practical stuff was so creative, we were astounded. Still the students that came to us from Christian Small Schools and the Steiner Schools had a degree that was not the same as in the students from public High Schools, their whole approach to everything was so much more mature and more creative.

    Then the syllabus changed right throughout the NSW Education system, where before so much was expected in the Public exams like the Higher School Certificate. Suddenly the material being written for sending out to our students - also being written by younger teachers, was like kindergarten compared to junior High School. What was expected, instead of full length answers going into pages long, suddenly became short answer questions of a line or two where examiners only looked for one word or a phrase and the long answers were about half a page. The students suddenly could not discuss a topic in depth or write in sentences to show their own mental progress. After this came I phones and texting, so they don"t even write in complete words, and from what I hear of the conversations outside my home as they go home from school most of their words are foul to one another, but they are not all of this generation, there are still those who are achievers, who are in the top bracket and mostly are those that have parents who help and guide and give them love and affection. So it is not all the dumbing down of fluoride or chemicals in the food and GMO's. So many of these students are living a lifestyle, that older people cannot come to terms with.

    Outside in our street, the seniors are coming to school in often their own cars, one taxi driver was fuming when he picked me up, about parents who either allow their son to drive a red sports car at 18 years old, others tell me of taking old ladies to shop in the afternoons, and they are badly harrassed by students in the main street, with a police car standing next to them doing nothing (because they are not allowed to) and these old ladies are terrified to do their shopping, last week junior students on sports day were wagging school, somewhere in the bushes behind our house, came into our yard and stole my chair, I heard them going back to school to get their bus, but didn't know about the chair at the time, they live in an entirely different world, and we are allowing them to become what they are, yet I believe they are often more loved than we ever were. How this has come about could be from the use of technology, since the computer does a lot of what our minds used to have to do for us.

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    Cearna, thank you for sharing your story, love that your writing is so fluid and descriptive. We are a product of our upbringing and environment, so they say . That yours was filled with so many challenges in and outside the home speaks volumes as to how you've overcome them to be the gifted and generous woman you are today. It's definitely not easy going through life as it were, experiencing it from the outside looking in but you persevered - you are a tenacious one! (As a side note, I sense there are a few of us in the TOT forum that lived our lives as as if we were on the outside looking in.)

    As a teacher, you observe first hand how through the years, the proverbial goal posts have been moved closer, and the act of learning is no longer adequately challenging for them. Meaning that gradual changes in curriculum as well as how we educate our children seem produce(?) young adults who aren't as prepared for life as we were at their age. If you could change one thing in today's education system, what would that be? How would you go about making that change?

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